What is community? Scientists explain how to create one and have a richer, fuller, healthier life.
Why Community Is So Important—and How to Find Yours
Updated on Apr. 30, 2025
Humans aren’t just social creatures—we’re basically golden retrievers with jobs. We need to belong. Whether it’s your circle of high school friends, office lunch group, church congregation or suspiciously competitive neighborhood trivia team, the desire to be part of a pack is one of humanity’s defining characteristics. Knowing how much we need human connection prompts us to ask: What is community, exactly?
“Community gives us identity, meaning, support, security, purpose, safety, stability, love and connection,” says social scientist Mick Brewer, PhD, a professor of communication at Lincoln University of Missouri who has been doing research into the power of communities for more than a decade. “I don’t want to sound dramatic, but we don’t just need our communities to thrive—we need our communities to survive. When communities fall apart, nations crumble.”
And this need is about biology, not just brunch plans, says psychiatrist Robert Waldinger, MD, co-author of The Good Life and current director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, the longest-running study of happiness in the world. “One of the biggest and most consistent findings of our research is that people who are more connected to family, to friends, and are part of a community, are happier and physically healthier than people who are less well connected,” Dr. Waldinger says.
But building real community can be tough. How do you find your people, your pack, your karaoke night ride-or-dies? Reader’s Digest spoke to Brewer and Dr. Waldinger to better understand what community is, as well as figure out how to build it in your life. Read on to learn more.
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What is community?
On paper, a community is just a group of people unified in some purpose, Brewer says. But sitting next to 300 strangers at the DMV doesn’t exactly feel meaningful, much less spark joy: You want people to actually know your middle name or your favorite cookie. Proximity does not equal community.
“True community is about meaningful connections with others on a regular basis,” Dr. Waldinger says. That could be a group chat with your besties (even one that’s 85% memes and 15% emotional support), your PTA crew, your church family or your weekly pickleball nemesis.
Wherever there’s shared interests, values or “I can’t believe we all survived that meeting” moments, you’ve got yourself a community, Dr. Waldinger says.
Why is community so important?
Humans aren’t made to go it alone. Having a strong community is basically the cheat code to a good life. And it’s not just about having people to help carry your couch when you move. “Community is scientifically proven to make us healthier and happier,” Dr. Waldinger explains. (Not to mention less likely to lose it when someone cuts in line at Costco or stops in the “hug-and-go” zone at the school.)
Here’s why having a real community matters:
You’ll experience greater well-being
People with strong community support are better at handling everyday stresses, according to a study published in Frontiers in Psychology in 2024. Researchers found that people who were part of a community showed reduced cortisol (aka stress hormone) levels and greater heart-rate variability, two key indicators of stress levels.
Why would this be true? Earlier research suggests that our central nervous systems are wired for connection. When we’re around people we trust, our brains shift into “rest and digest” mode instead of “fight or flight” mode, according to acclaimed neuroscience researcher Dr. Stephen Porges. It’s called co-regulation—a fancy term for the way we calm each other down just by being together.
You’ll feel safer
Community brings safety, and feeling safe is the foundation for, well, almost everything else, Brewer explains. “Without emotional and physical safety, we can’t even begin to thrive,” he says.
Community offers a built-in safety net: the friend who brings you soup when you’re sick, the neighbor who texts about a suspicious person on your porch (and wants to gossip about it, which is arguably just as important). When you’re part of a community, you have people you can depend on.
You’ll be healthier physically and mentally
“One of the most surprising things we found in a century of data was that our relationships are one of the biggest factors in health, especially as we age,” Dr. Waldinger says. “The size of the effect was huge! The people who were the most satisfied in their relationships at age 50 were the healthiest at age 80.”
A massive study from the University of North Carolina (which was updated in 2024) found that strong social ties are as predictive of a long life as avoiding smoking and maintaining a healthy weight. Isolation, on the other hand, is linked to a 50% higher risk of early death. (Yikes.) And you don’t need a million friends to get this effect, Brewer says—you just need a few good ones who will stop you from turning into a stressed-out hermit.
Beyond that, a study published in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences found that people with diverse social networks had lower levels of inflammation, better immune function and healthier blood pressure. So while it’s not a panacea, engaging with a community is an important part of living a longer, healthier life.
You’ll learn new things
“Communities are walking, talking treasure troves of knowledge,” Brewer says, adding that when you’re connected to people of different ages, backgrounds and experiences, you learn skills you didn’t even know you needed. It’s like crowdsourcing real life.
Perhaps you don’t know anything about how to fix a plumbing leak. Chances are, someone in your community does. Communities of people from different age groups are particularly beneficial: Young people gain wisdom, and elders stay sharp (and have someone to reset their Wi-Fi routers). Being part of a community gives you opportunities to learn from and teach others.
You’ll have access to more resources
How great is it to be able to knock on a neighbor’s door and ask to borrow something? Need a drill to finish your DIY project? Missing that one spice that’s somehow critical to your famous chili? Good news: There’s probably someone on your street who’s got you covered—and can throw in a tip about how to make it better.
These little exchanges—chats over the fence, last-minute ingredient rescues, impromptu driveway counseling sessions—are the glue that holds communities together, Brewer says. When we pool or share our resources, everyone wins and the bonds of the community are strengthened. Moments like these are what foster a sense of community.
You’ll be a nicer human
Empathy is like a muscle—it grows when you actually use it. People who regularly engage with a community are better at seeing things from others’ perspectives and are more compassionate, according to a study published in the Journal of Community Psychology in 2025.
When we build friendships within a community, compassion and empathy follow. Compassion rallies us to collect food and clothing for a family that has experienced a tragedy. Empathy compels us to listen to another’s concerns and worries, because we know what it’s like to go through hard times.
Simply put: The more faces you know, the more hearts you understand, Dr. Waldinger says.
You’ll be more cooperative (and like it)
Working with others can be frustrating, but communities teach us the necessity of cooperation. Think of all the times you’ve helped friends move, thrown block parties or picked up your neighbor’s kid from school. When you’re part of a community, you can be confident they’ll do the same for you. Collaboration and cooperation results in better neighborhoods, because little by little we create the world we want to live in.
How to build your community
Building a community takes time and effort, but it’s well worth your while. To get started, try the tips below.
Seek out local events
Dr. Waldinger recommends finding a community in your own backyard by keeping an eye out for events in your area. Check your community center, church bulletin board or town Facebook group. Whether it’s a ukulele jam session, tai chi class or a neighborhood cleanup, show up! Yes, talking to strangers is awkward, but remember: 90% of them are just as nervous as you are. (The other 10% are extroverts. Bless them.)
Other ways to connect with your local community include joining a place of worship or signing up for a sports team at the local rec center. And don’t keep your desire for community a secret: Let friends, family and colleagues know you’re looking to find your place. After all, they know you best. They might just recommend a group that speaks to your values.
Look online
Hunt for a local community online by creating a profile on community-focused sites like Meetup.com. There, you can find fellow gamers, wine enthusiasts, hikers and people who share your hobbies and interests. Once you’ve joined a group, find an event that speaks to you and begin building those social connections. The site will point you to online events as well as in-person gatherings.
That’s right: Online communities count! If you can’t find a local book club that fits your interests and schedule, join one online. (The Reader’s Digest Book Club is a great place to find a community of book lovers.)
Volunteer
Volunteering brings immense psychological and community benefits, Dr. Waldinger says. In fact, it’s one of his favorite ways to build community. Start by thinking of the causes you’re passionate about, and get involved. Whether it’s walking shelter dogs, helping out at a food pantry or tutoring kids, volunteering surrounds you with people who already share your values—and probably your sense of humor too. Not only will you build community with other volunteers and staff, but you’ll also get the satisfaction of helping others.
Call up old friends
Don’t overlook those old connections you’ve let fall by the wayside. Dr. Waldinger says reaching out to an old friend—even if it’s just to say “thinking of you!”—is way more appreciated than we assume. So give them a call or text! Yes, it might be awkward at first. Do it anyway. Chances are, your pals will be overjoyed, and you’ll be thrilled to have these important people back in your life again. After all, what is community if not the people who enrich our lives?
Just start
Don’t wait for the perfect idea or moment. Start building your community today. Any small step you take—a smile, a helping hand, a shared plate of cookies—is great progress, Dr. Waldinger says. Your nervous system, your mental health and your future self will thank you.
Remember: We’re not meant to do this life thing alone. Even golden retrievers need a pack.
Additional reporting by Tamara Jefferies.
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At Reader’s Digest, we’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. For this piece on what community is and how to build yours, Charlotte Hilton Andersen tapped her experience as a longtime journalist who often covers psychology, communication and etiquette for Reader’s Digest. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.
Sources:
- Mick Brewer, PhD, professor of communication studies at Lincoln University of Missouri; phone interview, April 25, 2025
- Robert Waldinger, MD, Harvard psychiatrist, co-author of The Good Life and current director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development; phone and email interviews, November 2023 and April 2025
- Frontiers in Integrative Neuroscience: “Polyvagal Theory: A Science of Safety”
- Frontiers in Psychology: “Social Support and Mental Health: The Mediating Role of Perceived Stress”
- Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences: “Social Relationships and Physiological Determinants of Longevity Across the Human Life Span”
- Journal of Community Psychology: “Empathy Development in Community-Engagement Course”
- Greater Good Science Center: “The Top 10 Insights from the ‘Science of a Meaningful Life'”
